Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Crying in Surround Sound

The last two days and nights have been rough.

Rough may be an understatement.

Just as we think things are started to fall into somewhat of a "routine", we "kind of" get what to do for Aiden and Alli is growing and thriving, something happens and everything changes. Aiden did not sleep well Monday night, and I was fine with chalking that up to his shots and just knowing he probably needed some extra love and cuddle time. Although, Aiden isn't much of a cuddler. He squirms and fidgets and can't seem to get completely comfortable unless you lay him in his crib, let him squirm around, find his fist, suck a little on it, then he'll fall asleep. (Well, sometimes it's that easy. Other times, add in at least 5-60 minutes of crying in there, then he'll fall asleep.) Alli woke up at 4:30 Tuesday morning too. We aren't sure why, Aiden wasn't crying that much to wake her, and he had just fallen asleep about 3ish. Needless to say, we had a bear of a little girl that morning. Everything was a crisis and meltdowns were coming one after another. It wasn't even 7:30am and she had thrown 3 or 4 temper tantrums. Whew.

Last night we did the whole bedtime routine for both babies, Alli was in bed and asleep by 7:45. Thank goodness. Onto Aiden. He was fed, changed, burped by 7:30ish too but just would not fall asleep. He stayed up until nearly 10, until he finally just passed out. At about 3ish, he started crying again, so after he was fed, changed and burped again, he was wide awake. He was laying on the changing table coo-ing and squeaking. It was really sweet and it almost made me forget that it was 3:45am. But, anyone who knows me knows I love my sleep, so I started getting frustrated. Come on Mr. Baby... it's the middle of the night, go back to sleep! Eventually he did, so back to bed I went by 4:30ish. Before we know it, it's 5:45 and we start to hear whimpers from Alli's room. What the heck? She usually is up between 6:15 and 7, these last few days of waking up before 6 has not been cool. So, Eric waited to see if she'd fall back asleep, and by 6:15 no such luck. She was still crying and whimpering. He took her downstairs and then I have no idea what happened. All I know is she started screaming, crying, sobbing, flailing, you name it... she was doing it. She was inconsolable. We couldn't hold her, touch her, get near her. I took her back to her crib, feeling helpless and frustrated. Eric and I sat on the floor of our bedroom with tears in our eyes. At that point, you can't help but wonder if your kids are normal? Are they okay? You turn to good ole reliable google and search to see if other parents ever go through the same thing. You text your own mom at 6am saying you're worried your kids aren't normal or something is wrong with them. You and your husband sit there holding each other wondering where you went wrong. Why do people even have babies?!

Then, after you've given her a good long while to calm down, you go get her from her room. And it's like the Tiny Terrorist has left her body. She smiles, says Hi mama! Hi Dada. Hi woof woof! Hi bubbles! Bubbles!! Ousssside?? OK sure, let's go outside. She squeals with delight and claps and says "yay!" She jumps out of your arms and grabs a ball while throwing it around the living room yelling "ball!! ball!!", laughing and giggling. Then, she wants to color. As she's coloring, she grabs each crayon and tells me what color it is. "Purple! Booo! Geeeen! Red! Yelllo! Pink! Back! Bown!" I'm so in awe of this little creature. How can she be so trying and so exhausting and so amazing and so cute and so wonderful all within hours of each other?

As soon as Ms. Sunshine is feeling better and happy, Mr. Man starts crying upstairs. So begins the cycle. Somehow, someday, we'll get through all this. Parenting is a challenge. And some days, it's a really challenging challenge and some days it feels like a challenge that will never ever end but always remember: IT DOES. Be glad the bad days end but remember the good ones do too. Today will end, tomorrow will end, your children's youth will end. It will end and you will wonder why you didn't enjoy more of it.

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